One more reason I love Europe...

I sat around all weekend feeling like crap and expectorating more crap out of my lungs.

And what do I have to show for my efforts: one freakin' scene for the play.

I'm never going to get this thing done...

Yep, I was right. Space Pirates.

Added bonus: Ghost ship!!!!!

When I was a kid I loved watching those early Japanese animation shows like Speed Racer and Battle of the Planets.


Watching the Boomerang marathon of Battle of the Planets has left me with a bad taste in my mouth. That show don't hold up so good. First off, Casey "Hannah-Barbara's Bitch" Kasem did the voice of Mark, or Jason, or one of the main guys. Second of all, that weird robot is just wrong. They took the short, stocky R2D2 thing and combined it with C-3PO's feyness. And half of the episode seems to be the robot narrating about what's going on. "Oh, my! Mark sure is headstrong! Now the Space Mummy is heading for the airport! I'd better alert G-Force!"

And he sure cleans his computer screens a lot.




So far I've watched two episodes. The first one featured the "Space Mummy." The current episode features the "Space Serpent." I'm gonna take a wild guess and predice that the next one will also feature some sort of evil "Space" creature.

Still, I think I remember why I liked watching it so much. It was the only cartoon show where you could see a female super-hero's underwear.

I had a dream last night that I was watching a high school basketball game featuring some of the guys I graduated with. The team was short several players, and the coach was forced to have his wife play. She was awful, and at one point, an opposing player caught the back of her lavender velour track suit and pulled her pants down. The coach called a time-out, asked his wife to step out of the game, and suddenly turned to me and asked if I could play.

Now even though all the guys on the team were still 18 years old, I was the age I am today, and I protested, saying, "Coach, I'm out of shape, I've got a cold right now...I can't play!"

"Too bad," he replied. "Get in there."

"Do you at least have a uniform for me?"

That's when I woke up to the sound of the phone ringing. I'll never know if I did any good in the game. Or if I had a uniform on.

Oh yeah. This girl Jenna at work loaned me her copy of Zoolander and The DaVinci Code. Haven't watched the film yet, but the book's pretty good. Yes, I know, it's been popular forever, and why am I just now getting on the bandwagon?

Well, that's just it; I'm such a snob that I didn't want to go anywhere near it, for fear that it could be another "Tuesdays with Morrie" or American Idol or something.

Maybe I'm not a snob. Maybe I'm just not a sheep. Ehh, who cares. It's a good book. I'll write more about it later.

Still stuffed up and my head is killing me. Fell asleep on the couch for about 2 1/2 hours, which means I'll never get to sleep tonight.

Meh--I have nothing new to report.

Just finished seeing American Splendor for the first time (finally), and felt like talking about it for a few minutes.

First off, Paul Giamatti is such a great actor, and it's just great to see a guy who looks like he does get such good roles. Hollywood ain't done yet.

And second of all, it's really a great story. When I was a kid I read comics and watched "Late Night With David Letterman" a lot, so I knew who Harvey Pekar was, even though I never actually bought a copy of his comic. (I had to spend my money on all those damn X-Men comics.) But "American Splendor" the comic book, play, and movie are all about just ordinary life, which is, in the end, a lot more interesting than anything fictional.

Those that know me know that I love "The Lord of the Rings" more than anything else, and it's a rather escapist book. But when I write, I write mostly about myself, and the world around me, because that's what I know, and that's the story I like telling. So I can identify with Harvey that way.

I don't know. It's a great movie. And he seems like a good guy. Go rent it.

Tony Pierce, I love ya, but I feel like I've got nothing to say since you say it first! (I guess that's a compliment.) Some of the things that we share a love of:

--The Cubs
--Hating the Bush administration
--Bunny Mcintosh

I have purposely stayed away from your site recently so as to not feel like I'm aping you, and as I read it tonight, I saw all the things that I would have done but didn't, or didn't get to work.

Case in point: I had that picture of Cheney holding the rifle up on my blog, but it didn't work for some reason, so I took it down. As I was doing this, I was watching the Cub game, like I usually do, and thought about posting a play-by-play. And, it turns out, you did that.

So I salute you, Tony Pierce. You are indeed the King of all Blogging. I stand in your shadow, but only for now...

I stayed home from work today to rest up and hopefully be back to 100% by Tuesday (or at least something close to it.) I was going through a pile of newspapers and magazines I hadn't read up on, and decided to actually read my alumni magazine from Bradley University. It usually doesn't have much to say, but I decided to flip through it and see if there was anyone I recognized.

I'm sorry to say I did. An article about Dr. John Kenny, my former Astronomy professor, whom I mentioned (I think) in my travel blog a while back. He has been diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor.

There were several professors that I remember from Bradley, including Bowers and Green, but Kenny sticks with me the most. On the first day of class, he walked in and in his booming Irish lilt, said the following lines:

"Though I am old with wandering,
Through hollow lands and hilly lands,
I will find out where she has gone,
and kiss her lips and take her hands;
and walk among long dappled grass,
And pluck till time and times are done,
The silver apples of the moon,
The golden apples of the sun."

That's the final verse from Yeats' "The Song of Wandering Aengus," which ever since that moment has been my favorite poem. Dr. Kenny used this poem to talk about his love of teaching, about how staring up at the stars was like plucking "the silver apples of the moon." All the literature and philosophy and teaching courses in the world couldn't have explained life better to me, and those words he said still echo in my ears every day that I walk into my classroom.

I am heartbroken at this news, and I hope that Dr. Kenny still has time to walk among long dappled grass with his glimmering girl, and pluck those golden apples of the sun.

My thoughts are with you and your family, Dr. Kenny, at this time.

If I learned anything from watching 5-6 straight hours of "The Restaurant," along with another frustrating Cub loss, is that product placement in these shows is something that I can't even comprehend. It's everywhere, and before I know it, they'll be slipping in pop-up ads in my dreams.

I'm also really hungry for some good Italian food...

Still sick, and so I've decided to crash on the couch all day again, and I think I know what just might be the cure...

Obviously I've made major changes to the blog. I'm such an idiot; I could have been doing so much more with this thing, but I just haven't sat down to really figure it out.

Van Morrison is a God who walks among us...

By the way, there are certain things in the world that just bug the piss out of me, for whatever reason. Right now it's the way McDonalds is shoving "I'm Lovin' It" commercials down my very sore throat.

I've got a sore throat that feels like someone kicked me in the back of it with baseball spikes. I'm hopped up on codeine to quell the coughing. It's going to be a weekend of lying on the couch watching films. Maybe I can get a copy of "Kill Bill."

"The Apprentice" is finally over, and even though I tend to hate most of the reality crap that's on TV these days (mostly the whoring of women to chase after some rich guy), I really liked this show. Again, even though I hate the corporate world, the Donald is pretty perfect to embody this type of show, since he's such a character himself, as he proved on his recent "SNL" appearance.

The only thing I didn't like about the finale is that it seemed to switch to some bad "Tonight Show"-type production values once it went "live", and Trumpy seemed a little stiff reading the cue cards. (He did a much better job on the afore-mentioned "SNL." I'm glad Bill from Chicago won, and I'm even more glad that he rejected the LA golf course job and took the job building the new Trump building on Wells Street.

Another thought about "The Apprentice": The Donald must be in trouble financially (and Time magazine recently reported this), and I guess he figures that jumping on the reality TV bandwagon is his way to put out his "brand", i.e. his name, to the public again, and hope to regain some of his late-80s luster.

One final thought: Sam was a spaz, but Omarosa is a fucking psychotic liar and I hope that she never finds work again.

Okay, one more. The women on that show were smooooookin'!!!

Is anyone reading this?

I have a few rituals that I can't give up without things turning ugly. One of them is every Sunday I brew a hella lot of coffee and pore through the Sunday Tribune. A few observations whilst I read:

-Even with Berkley Brethead bringing back "Opus", the comics still suck. A question: do little kids actually do those stupid puzzles they fill the pages with, and why do tool companies take out full-page ads in the freakin' comics pages?

-Reading the TV Weekly, I noticed that this week's "Friends" episode guest-stars lil' Dakota Fanning; I don't think I've ever actually seen a movie that she's been in, but I just hate her for some reason. Probably it has something to do with the fact that Bravo is running a show this week called "Showbiz Mom and Dads."




-Even though I've never seen one of 'lil Dakota's movies, you can't swing a dead cat without seeing her in one. And yet I have to scour the video store for decent Zooey Deschanael films.

The rest of the paper was filled with the usual stuff; opinions about the latest developments in Iraq; one feature focused entirely on Condoleeza Rice's smile (??); and there was a lot of promotion for Mel Gibson's Passion of Jim Caviezel.

I know it's Easter, and I should be reflecting on the resurrection of our Lord Jesus, but it's the part of Christianity that I've always liked least. I just don't get into the suffering and death and rising up to Heaven. I'm one of those guys that looks to Jesus as a teacher, and since all I hear about is "He DIED for US!!!!", all I do instead is think of Buddha under the lotus tree, meditating, content.

Siddhartha didn't have to die to be a wonderful teacher, and I'll take that version, I guess. Not that I don't like violence or suffering, blah blah blah. Look--isn't religion just choosing the story you like best?

I'm going to go eat a ham sandwich now and write the play.

By the way, I had a dream last night that I was walking around in London and I sat down at an Italian restaurant across from this gorgeous waitress (she looked like Kiera Knightley), and our eyes met, and I thought something wonderful was about to happen, when suddenly two guys in black suits grabbed my chair, dragged me over to the curb, and dumped me into the street. After collecting my things, I saw her walk into a crowded marketplace, and I raced after her, scanning for her eyes in the crowd, but I lost her.

Sorry there haven't been many updates this week. I've been using all of my Writing Time to get deep into The Bonfire. I've got at least the first act completed, and I know how it'll all end (at least I think I do), but it's that middle Act that I'm struggling with.

Since it's about high schoolers going off to college, and also about their respective love lives, how do you think it should end? Happily? Those relationships usually get burned away within a month or so of college. (Hence the title....get it?)

Well, I'm back to the regular blog again, although I don't know what to talk about at the moment. Watching the Cubs losing miserably to the Reds right now. I suppose that means that this blog has been going for a while now, since I started it watching them during the playoffs.

Nahh, this thing is small and piddly compared to the mammoth blogs of others I read. (Tony P, I'm talking to you.)

Speaking of Tony, I was pretty floored when I saw that he got married the other day. I know to beware the slogan "nothing in here is true," but when I saw that the old man actually was a one-woman man and was ready to settle down with her, I was touched.

Of course, it probably just means that Bunny could be mine someday! (AB, if you're reading this, I'm just kidding. Just an internet crush. No! Not even that. Yes, it is! Wait, I don't even know you. Ahh, but if I did...)

Okay, I think that little outburst reveals one thing: I need a girlfriend. It's time to open myself up to the world a bit again. Spring is here, and I need to get out of the Winter of my Discontent. I've had walls, America, walls up around me, and it's time to knock them down. Time to get off the couch, back on the bike, and be a man again.

This may involve crushing some souls along the way, but it has to be done. I'm like a meteor, baby, that streaks through the heavens and pulls everything towards it. Erm, maybe that's a black hole. Okay, I'm like a black hole with a kick-ass ride that roars through the night sky, and all that get in my path shall despair!